Of Cabbages and Kings

Okay, enough with the politics...let's talk about something that doesn't make my ears bleed.

1. Went to see "Pirates of the Caribbean" again, and it's even better the second, or, well, oKAY, fifth, time around. Once you're not concentrating so hard on following what is after all a fairly complex plot, you can just dig the fun stuff going on around the edges. Like Jack in yoga meditation on the beach while Norrington and Elizabeth dig up the chest (noticed it the first time, but it still makes me laugh out loud every time I see it), or that hilarious conversation between Pintel and Ragetti on the correct pronunciation of "Kraken", or the way Jack runs (Johnny Depp says he modeled his running style on a gecko, which is perfect).

Or checking out the jewelry, always an important part of my moviegoing experience. Jack has three new rings, quite nice ones, and steals another from Tia Dalma (notice what else she has on that cluttered table...), but Elizabeth, sadly, does not weigh in on the jools side, spending most of the movie in cabin boy drag. Disappointing.


2. I found a new place to cook lobsters for me! Huzzay with three times three to, natch, The Lobster Place. They have two branches, one in Chelsea Market over on 15th Street and 9th Avenue, and one on Bleecker and I think Leroy, perilously close to Pearl's Oyster Bar (which makes the best lobster rolls in NYC, only they don't do takeout). But they will steam lobsters for you, and they make their own lobster rolls, supposedly, though I myself have never seen this and there's no sign or anything (at least at Chelsea Market), and they have a lot of other nice stuff too.

So sucks to YOU, Whole Foods!


3. Back in the head-exploding category: Lord God of Hosts, do I HATE K-MART! I don't go there often...a K-mart in the East Village is just WRONG...but it's useful for kitchen stuff and gym socks and suchlike. (Word of warning: Don't buy the big decorative pillows---they bump and clump and sag alarmingly, although their soft chenille covers are so tempting. And Martha Stewart sheets and towels are horrible. But then so is she.)

Anyway, this morning, 9:30, quarter to ten, they had ONE register, count it, one, open downstairs where I had gone to buy water and juice for work and chocolate to feed my staff. ONE register, and five people ahead of me on line who were apparently furnishing their entire apartments, so many and so large were the items they had lugged to the register. Oh, and the escalator was broken AGAIN, as it seems to be pretty much all the time, and my knee was acting up so I couldn't climb very well.

I pointed all this out to the two "Associates", as they're rather demeaningly called, having a merry talkfest in the vicinity, but the lollygagging pair just said there's only one register open (like I couldn't see that, you morons?) so go upstairs and pay if you don't want to wait. I replied in a loud voice that I WOULD if only I were able to CLIMB THE BROKEN FREAKIN' ESCALATOR, and then dumped all my stuff and walked out. Well, they had nothing to do, let THEM pick up after me...

4. So then I thought I'd go over to the Dark Side (Starbucks, across the street) for a double chocolate chip creme frappuccino venti no whipped cream, my indulgence of choice. Hey, I deserved it, I'd had a bad start to the day...the heat, K-mart, the heat, the heat...but Starbucks was CLOSED. The heat, the heat...the lack of power. Which made me concerned. If they're having power issues, right there in our neighborhood, which had successfully dodged blackouts over the past few weeks, what bodes it for the rest of us? There was a red Con Ed emergency truck parked across the street from my building as I left for work, which put the wind up, I can tell you...

I think maybe I need to go see "Pirates" again just to calm me down...yeah. That's the ticket.