O Come Let Us Abhor Them...
Hark unto their cries of outrage and pain:
"Ooooh, it’s blasphemous!" (Only if you’re a Christian, my friends...and maybe not even then. Do not Christians make a big fat deal about Jesus being both god AND man? So why wouldn’t he, a MAN, wed and have a child with a woman whom he considered his equal? Hey, Zeus did it all the time!)
"Ooooh, it’ll give the world a bad impression about the Catholic Church!" (This with a straight face from the people who brought you the Inquisition, the Vatican bank scandal and child molestation on an almost institutional scale. Not to mention the lying and cover-ups that went on about that last. Jesus must be SO proud...)
Dig this (from a New York Times article): “In Rome recently, Archbishop Angelo Amato, the No. 2 official in the Vatican's doctrinal office, told Catholic communications officials: ‘If such slanders, offenses and errors had been directed at the Koran or the Holocaust, they would have justly provoked a world uprising. Instead, directed at the Church and Christians, they remain unpunished. I hope you will all boycott the movie.’
“Cardinal Francis Arinze, a prominent Vatican official from Nigeria, said in a recently released documentary made by a Catholic film agency that Christians should take 'legal means' against 'The Da Vinci Code,' though he did not explain how."
Oh HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I’ll just BET he didn’t! Sorry...no, really, AHAHAHAHAHAHA! Do these people actually HEAR themselves? These are the same soul fascists who tried to force Brother Mel Gibson and his “Passion of the Christ” down our collective throats as the Gospel According to St. Mel when it was really based on sheer invention (hey, FICTION! JUST LIKE “DA VINCI CODE”!) and the ravings of a nutty eighteenth-century female German “mystic” who wanted Jesus to be her imaginary boyfriend. Okay, then!
So Angie da Bish is basically saying, ‘Yeah, we too have ample cause to riot like Islamofascists, only we’re far too holy and godly to do that.’
Uh-HUUUH. Note his use of the word "unpunished." Now there's a nice live-and-let-live attitude for us all to learn from! Sounds just like a sour old mullah getting ready to push out another fatwa. You can tell he thinks it’s a damn crying shame the year is 2006 and not 1406. Back then, hoo ponies!, churchmen had REAL power! Could rip out your fingernails and clamp your privates and char-broil you nicely at the stake just for THINKING unChristian thoughts! How sad that those days of torture and punishment in Jesus' name are behind us, he thinks, Archbishop Doctrino, the voce not at all sotto...
Before people get the wrong idea, I must interject here that I have NO problem with Jesus. Maybe man, maybe god, certainly glorious avatar of the Supreme—doesn’t really matter. My personal faith lies elsewhere, and my beef is purely with the hierarchy. There are plenty of good, wise, holy people who describe themselves as Catholics and Christians, and who are a grace and blessing to any god's service; I honor and admire them, and they're not what I'm complaining of here.
Anyway, Jesus and the Church that professes him as King and Lord have very little to do with each other these days. Jesus, or at least his holy ghostwriters, had some superlatively good and righteous things to say about love and peace and Do unto others. They’re good things no matter WHOSE god said them. But the Church? Should be called Paulism, not Christianity.
Oh, and Jesus is the first, last, and ONLY friend women have ever had in the power structure, sorry, church that bears his name. Seven sacraments for men and only six for women, my sistren! Physicality and sexuality, the glorious gift of God, turned into something dirty and impure! Nuns being little more than the servants of spoiled priests who live high off the hog...Waterford crystal, bone china, custom-made carpets with the episcopal seal woven in...while sisters live hand to mouth in apartments over garages, begging for food and clothing like it’s still the time of St. Francis and St. Clare. (Looking at YOU, Bishop of Rockville Centre! You who forced a whole conventful of nuns out so you could take over their digs and make a McMansion for yourself, even though you already had a palatial establishment! Try living humbly in a stable, like the one your Lord and God was born in!) I can document it all, boys! Much of it personally! So don’t even get me STARTED, because I’ll never, ever stop...
For many centuries now, the Catholic Church hierarchy has been nothing but a vast financial and temporal power cynically passing itself off as a pure spiritual entity. And the Christian fundies, with their Cadillac-driving “ministers” and big giant Jesuslands and plastic California cathedrals, are just as bad.
Not “Feed my sheep” but “Fleece those lambs.” If I were they, I’d be a LOT more careful with their free-and-easy talk of what Jesus would like and do and think of them. If Jesus came back, as they’re always bleating he will, they’d crucify him all over again, because he’d be plenty pissed off with their self-serving worldly agendas. Well, maybe he’d whip them out of their temples (and Porsches) first. Hopefully. Rapture, take them away NOW, please, so the rest of us don’t have to put up with their idiocy any longer than we already have.
I have watched this Circus Hypocriticus go down for years and years, and it absolutely CRIPPLES me with laughter to hear them all speaking ex cathedra from their fundaments now. I say gods bless Dan Brown, and may a thousand more like him arise in the land to speak fictional truth to bloated and corrupt and self-important “spiritual” power.
Get over it, cassock boys! (And the operative word is indeed “boys”...) Your He-Man Woman Haters Club is a dinosaur on its last legs. You’ve been spiritually bankrupt for centuries. All you’ve got left is some very beautiful artwork and architecture. Karma’s a bitch, man...
You know, I have no idea if the premise of DVC is true or not. I’d love to believe it is, and perhaps I even do. It almost doesn’t matter at this point. The Catholic hierarchy, for its own twisted misogynistic reasons, painted Mary of Magdala as a whore when there was absolutely NO BIBLICAL SUPPORT for such a charge, and indeed much evidence to the contrary—contemporary evidence that she was the “disciple Christ loved.”
No, it suited them to smear her, in their man-piggy little ways, and they could get away with it, so they did. THEY’RE the whores, not Mary. Whether she was Mrs. Christ or just a close personal friend, she deserved a lot better from the guys than she’s gotten. I can relate...I think most women can.